No love just fun and play.

influences:
4 shots
2 mixed drinks
2 beers
short skimpy hot lacy dress
strappy high heels


boys:
boy 1
boy 2


The situation:
Here we go.  You see when I go hard, I go pretty hard... So I learned a few things.
Pre-game: the word pre-game...I had the nerve to question what that was back in the beginning of my freshman year.  How embarrassing...  
But anyways I've learned and experienced about almost everything.


Let's see how was my weekend you ask?.... Let's go 1st/ 2nd person, I kind of like it that way.


It started with of course the generic freshman "pre-game" the start of all Thursday/ Friday/ Saturday nights.  And with the effect that was about to sink in, but hasn't started yet, we headed off to the party.  Lucky for me we know the DJ. Girls get in for free, guys get in for five, or in some cases if they wanted to rip you off, they charge you 10.


The night starts off less dangerous and predictable.  Empty, but full of alcohol, that's the only pro. It starts late, the feelings get going, the jungle juice is up to the full, the keg is taken outside, smokers go to the backyard, the dance floor gets crowded, the room starts to smell like beer, empty cups are put in random places, people are starting to act a little more confident than usual and well my girlfriends come over and we dance to great music.


Then you'll have your occasional random guy come over to ask if they can dance with you and you of course reject them and keep dancing.  Sometimes guys don't understand that it's better to just dance with them and keep dancing until they say no, at least you got to dance with girls a little ...right? I don't know, if I was a guy I think I would do that.  ...Instead of creepily walking around roaming the dance floor all the time staring.  Either dance or stay to the corner and sip your beer.  


So as the night is great, I get a little lonely even if I am with my girlfriends, and I see that boy I've been eye-ing.  And no I haven't been eye-ing him for the past few hours, more like the past few parties.  I knew a few things about him, he's friends with the owner of the house, and I was thinking his name was Jack or Rick (Yes I'm using an alias here)...He also lives at the house I'm at and well, he's been here every time you're here.  And yes...He's been eye-ing me too.  


This time I'm bored I stand to the side watching him from afar, and this other guy this Asian guy, kind of normal looking asks if I want water.  What a kind fellow, I accept and well he's very average, We talk, I get his name, too bad I don't remember it because all I can do is keep staring at "the guy."  The guy comes over I step in front of him, and ask him for his name saying I've seen him before, he tells me his name, Zach. (alias)  He asks me for mine, and also states he's seen me also,  he's holding an Absolute bottle, and asks if I want to go up stairs to take shots.  What a nice invite.  I accept, leaving the kind water offering guy.  Yikes.  


We go up stairs, and he's kind of in a hurry, he goes past the bathroom line and tries to open a door next to it. it's locked, we go up another flight of stairs, finds a door that opens its dark, sketchy as fuck.  All I see is a broken couch on the floor and he takes a seat, my drunk comments consisted of this is sketchy as fuck, literally, he grunts, we take one shot it burns well and very tasty.  We sit in the dark, our faces get closer.  And we kiss, he's soft, kind of gentle? its a drunk passionate kiss, he lays down I'm on top.  As we're getting to know each other, my girlfriends text me, she calls me, I laugh, I comment, I tease, He teases back, touchingly. I'm still sitting on top of him and he tries to undress me, but I beat him to it, I took his shirt off first, we get a little sexual, just casual and I decide I didn't really want to do this.  I get up with the phone in my hand talking away, saying I have to go, he grunts and touches me proactively as I leave.  
I meet my girlfriends, I see the water offering guy, he comments on how I hooked up with his friend, I say w/e, I dance with him a little feeling pity for him I leave.  


The emptying house becomes vacant, and we just dance like no one's watching.  I dare one of my girlfriends to dance with a guy who lives in my building.  She clearly rejects the dare, but I go even further and dare her to make out with him, she says hell no.  Hahah, so what do I do? I dance with that guy a little, then hand my girlfriend over to him.  (Yes, I hooked up with this guy a while back, he's basically well a loser, but its one of those guys who it doesn't matter if you hook up with him haha.)  And well, they're dancing, they get to a wall and they hook up! I know hilarious.


Later I take her away, since they just won't keep their hands to themselves and with my girlfriends we go to a frat.  They're open.  And it's late in the night, so it's getting dead.  We dance like there's no tomorrow, our feet hurting like fuck and our breaths smelling like alcohol, as we go I steal a bag of chips and a crown, Yes I'm classy.  
We end the night going back to our dorms and dancing with the lights on blasting music like quiet hours don't exist.  


Typical?
Occasionally....
I have to say a college experience is definitely something you can't describe until you experience it.  Makes you think what have you been doing all your life until this point, what have we been doing that was fun? ...haha.
And then you get to a point where you're tired of this college life.
What? right....
I'm influenced by my friends opinion unfortunately.  
Can't we make do without the random hook ups but the with the occasional alcoholic beverages and constant laughter?  Maybe... but sometimes we find a game we're pretty good at, and so much fun.  


Another thing, what have I done?  I definitely act so much more confident, and not myself under this influence.  I've become dominate over friends making them do things.  What have I become?  Does this make me controlling, does this make me feel good about myself?  It makes me feel good about myself a little, yet I feel stupid for doing it.  Confusing, and I'm not explaining this very clear.  Good thing I'm going home for the next two weeks.  I need a break.


Living next door.

I don't know how to say this.

But just...think before you act.
Here's my specific situation:  
Ok. So we have this project to work on. And we are scheduled to meet at 7, but I get a text from one member asking if we can do it at 7:30 instead, but I told her that's the time I need to leave, and she doesn't answer back.  7 rolls around and I text everyone (3 people) that I'm downstairs and one texts me back saying he thought we were meeting at 7:30 since the other girl asked if 7:30 was okay, but I told him that I told her that I have to go at 7:30.


Here's the mistake, the girl that asked if it was okay to meet at 7:30 instead should not have texted to do so only 10 minutes before 7.  Also she should not have assumed that one person said it was okay means it is okay for everyone else.  And the other is that she should have answered me after I said I had to leave.  After I texted her I was downstairs, she text at 7:15 saying she would be there in 10 minutes.  


7:30 rolls around and no one has showed up.  One guy shows up, and then the other shows up, saying that she had to eat because she hasn't yet.  That's why she asked to reschedule half an hour late.  What the fuck.  And the other girl...well she overslept...typical...


Be smart okay? I mean you could've grabbed something to eat before, or something, and it only really takes half an hour to do this assignment, you could've waited that long.


Some people are just so indecisive and not smart. 

At least pretend you're ok.

When you're on the job.
I know you don't want to be here. I know it's just work study/ work. I know its hot outside (although its air conditioned inside). I know maybe you are not in a good time in life, but still.  At least pretend you're okay!  It's your job, you are getting paid/ getting some sort of compensation for doing it.  Don't take out your glares and mean stares on me.  I just need to get a book! For gods sake chill a little, and maybe smile once in a while.  People are such bitches who don't deserve to be doing anything or dealing with customers.  Sometimes I just wish I could have a complaint button.  
I also understand from their point of view.  Sometimes I get ahead of myself and act well a little unfriendly, but now I definitely regret it.  Customers haven't done anything to you and you are already acting like you are annoyed of them.  It's just unfair.  Next time you're on the job, think twice before not being friendly.  They didn't even do anything!!!

Embracing the nothingness.

Enjoying alone time.
With flashy lights everywhere, its nice to tone it down once in a while.  This was definitely one of those weekends of deservedness.  After a week of two tests and a prior week of viruses its great to just do nothing.  This would definitely be a time to cue Bruno Mar's Lazy Song.  Not to mention it was rainy/ rainbowy sunny the next day of this great and non celebratory Easter.   
It also comes with the fact that calling my family to see how things are doing made me find out they were off to Williamsburg for 'vacation'...and they 'forgot' to tell me...? Anyways, I enjoyed my weekend of 'me' time and a bunch of reading for the good.  I can't describe how it has rejuvenated me to the fullest of almost 100%.  I will miss these past 72 hours.  The 'straighting-my-hair-even-though-I-am-not-going-out', the 'laying-in-my-bed-of-nothingness', the 'pretending-to-pass-out-after-a-movie', 'to waking-up-with-nothing-to-do' and 'putting-on-make-up-just-because-it's-fun/ trying/experimenting-out-different-make-up.'
Not to mention seeing an admiree of my favorite on the way to the times I leave for food. Of course the boyfriend could be out of it, but this admiree is definitely in my favor of the talkativeness and engage-ness.  Lovely.
Although the only thing I have to complain about a little is the minor headache, probably due to the over compensating levels of AC I turned the dial to, but way too lazy to turn off.  (Resulted from my lazy day.)
Yet I am more than welcoming this week and the classes to come with it.  Oh what a busy schedule tomorrow, at least I well enjoyed my weekend of a break!  Doesn't everyone want to? Haha, make the best of what you have while you have it, because it definitely doesn't last longer than you want it to!
Is it volleyball courts and shirtless men time?

Going to sleep happy.

Let's start with something nice today.

For the past few days, I've been ending my very last few minutes of each day very satisfactorily.  Is it my own align in life? or am I doing this on my own?  I feel a combination of both but I would like to say that I am doing something different each night.  And no, I'm not doing anything dirty for those who are thinking that.  I am actually thinking happy thoughts.  I think of the days when I was the most happiest.  Although along with the happiest moments with my ex, there is the thoughts of not having those currently..haha...but I cut it off right there.  I've been waking up a lot more lethargic though.  Having a more difficult time waking up, but more in state where "I'm so comfy and had such a good night's sleep that I don't want to get up" feel.  Although of course this also resulted me being 40 minutes late to my lecture.... x_x

Three annoyances from yesterday.

Runners of the last minute.

Here we go, I live in the city, and there are things called crosswalks where pedestrians have to walk across when crossing the street.  And on these crosswalks theres a blinking sign to either tell you, you can walk, or you cannot.  There's even these new crosswalks with countdowns telling you how much time you have left before you're about to get hit by a car.  Now on to my rant, I have come across so many of these people who as I am putting my foot down on the other side of the sidewalk as there are only 2 seconds left, I see three blurs of people go past me in the hopes of making that light.  Why not take your time and wait I don't know 40 seconds for the next light?  If you're running late, there's a reason you're running late already go with it.  You just end up looking stupid running into the street and almost getting hit, while the car getting ready for it's green light almost hits you and you end up screaming at the car saying "It's my right of way!"  Learn people....

White Asians.

So I'm at the library and this girl just screams EVEN THOUGH I LOOK ASIAN I AM WHITE I ACT WHITE AND I LAAAAKE WHITE BOYS... kill me. hahahaha...Give yourself a little respect and take a look in the mirror once in awhile.  I know you were born here, but still your ancestral back ground is from Asia! Chill with it!

Extremely Fobby Kids.

 I go to a University with a lot of international Asian students.  And with these fobby kids comes their unique sense of style.  I mean you can tell if they are from abroad or not.  You can tell if they were born here or from overseas.  Its a big differences just from the clothes, not even from the jabbering language they sometimes yell.  And I'm thinking to my self, yeah sure respect yourself, and show your true colors...But we are in America, I was just wondering if you can just slightly try to fit in? ...maybe? ...maybe sometimes dress like an American.  You'll be living here for the next four years of your life...so why not? ... try it a little, maybe you'll become more friendly with Americans too, and you can have more American friends and have a little diversity instead of just making friends from the same area as you.  Just a thought,  some Americans aren't that bad! Sure some can be jerks, especially on a campus with alcohol and recreational drugs but still, find a good crowd, it's somewhere out there!

 Be back soon.


~
Be Quiet.
I don't care who you are, what you're doing, but if this is my room and you happened to walk in respect my wishes.  If I want to watch a show, among shows that I never watch ever, can you at least be quiet? Okay so you CAN'T be quiet, can you respect me and at least not rant and complain about my show, before I start screaming at you!  If you don't like what you see then get out because you being there isn't making anybody else happier.  
=D night.

Only a few hours left for those celebrating.

2 Annoyances

The first.
Would be the fact that ...honestly, college is easy.  It's not that hard to read chapters before lecture, study, party, go to bed before 2 on weekdays and attend all classes, lectures, recitations, tutor sessions, labs, practices, group meetings or what every academic activities you have. But for the past six or seven months I've been here, I've noticed so many people disappearing.  First people that I've worked with, people that I live with, then people who I see every day and then my closer friends.  And then there was a point where even I had to even consider leaving.  What the f.... right? You would think.  I can't count how many reasons there are, how many factors there are within 'dropping out' or 'leaving school'.  I can seriously count 10 people off the top of my head, easily.  
The number one reason would be money.  What a typically issue.  It's almost a reason that we can't get around, I mean surely people could say 'Oh borrow loans!' oh, trust me, I've been borrowing.  And I am NOT looking forward to when I graduate.  Of course I'll factor in those who well, just didn't manage their time wisely and decided to smoke up and spend most of their times either by the toilet or in cold showers.  But I'm sure half of those drop outs have a good reason.  Don't judge just saying.


The second.
I've been hearing this a lot lately.  'Stop trying to be/acting Asian you aren't. You in your polo shirt, Levi jeans, gray converses, and North Face.' quoted from a good friend.  I get it.  I act...I don't know.. my definition of normal? How else am I suppose to describe it.  There are some people out there who are wearing three different kinds of strips in one outfit, or plaid and argyle print together.  Although I am one ethnicity, and of that ethnicity they act a certain way, dress a certain way... I'm a little different? ok? But I still consider myself that ethnicity.  I can't help it if I have that sense of style plus it makes me feel comfortable.


The one living next door.

Welcome.

I am here today to introduce my blogging site.  How formal.... well what else am I suppose to write?
Here are a few reasons as to why now, why in general and who am I.

• There's a few people with this screen name....and well I feel unfortunate for the people who have the identical names as I, because I am about to write/post/talk about everything I have an opinion on.
• I hope in this direction I could improve my writing abilities, or my lack of writing abilities.  This goes the same for spelling, grammar and all that good stuff.
• Hasn't everyone wanted someone or somewhere to vent out to? I'm sure the first people who started a "blog" or "myspace" was to have a bunch of "friends" or someone to read their thoughts and opinions.  PS it is healthy to vent, stop hating.
• When I have time I need something to do; although I don't have a lot of it...I'm trying something new.  
• You might run into this site, you might know me, you might think you know me, you might not know me, or no one will see this site...and I don't care. What a great site.
• The reason why I choose a blog which is way old school rather than a tumblr, blogging facebook, blogging myspace, or even a xanga and other sorts is because I was ...well inspired by a random ass person.  =D
• Lastly, no one knows its me.  I'm just another 1 and a trillion or more bloggers out there, soooo.....it's almost like a free country...but more like a free blog. heh.

Until next time, which might be fairly soon...